Death Was Arrested

Isn't it weird to look at pictures of your parents when they were little?  It's hard to imagine mom or dad. running around, playing with their siblings, hanging out with friends, carefree.  Oh, they tell us the stories-"When I was young, my brothers and I rode our bikes everywhere." "I tap danced on a riverboat in St. Louis!" "Your dad and I weren't allowed to date during basketball season." Occasionally,  we'll see a glimpse of childlike playfulness while  they remember, or when they stop to play with their own children or grandchildren.   But it's difficult to align the parent we know now with the child they once were. 

 My mom, Beverly, was born on March 12, 1951.  I know that because she told me, Grandma Quigley confirmed it.  :)  She had 3 brothers, a mom, a dad, they lived on a farm.  She met my dad sometime around 1966, they dated until they married July 12, 1969.  Dad was drafted into the army shortly after they were married.   They spent time apart.  They spent time at a base in Arizona.  Mom came home, Dad went to Vietnam.  I only know all of this because I've heard the stories and I've seen some pictures.

I think my mom would say she had a good life.  She loved my dad and her children.  She loved her family.  She loved her friends.  She liked her job and she loved her church.  She was mostly healthy and happy and active.  Mom and Dad liked to travel, even if they didn't go very far.   Some of this I know because she told me, some because I've heard others tell it, and some I know from looking through pictures and seeing her expression in them.  

 

On May 25, 2017, my mom started a life without us.  One that I can only imagine.  I wish I could hear her stories, see her expression as she experiences her new life, a life promised to her by the only One who can make and keep such a promise.  My mom suffered terribly with her illness, absolute torment.  But on the morning she died, my dad and I sat beside her and, although we couldn't see it, her mourning ended and her feet rose to dance.  The life she lives now is just as real as the life she lived.  I don't have to be there to know it's happening.  1 Corinthians 15:22 says that our human end is death, but in Christ we are made alive again, if we belong to Him.  Matthew 22:32 says God is God of the living, not of the dead.  Revelation 21:4-5 promises that Jesus will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there will be no more death or sorrow or crying or pain.  All these things are gone forever.  Jesus, the one who arrested death, says "Look!  I am making everything new!" And then he said, "Write this down, for what I tell you is trustworthy and true." 

So although I don't have pictures or stories from Mom about the life she's living now, I know she's living it because she trusted in the One who tells the truth.  In fact, her life has just begun!

She tells My story

Our pastor, Jeff Wagner, started a sermon series on the Acts of the Apostles.  In the book of  Acts, Jesus presented Himself  alive to the apostles many times over the 40 days after His resurrection.  He talked to them face-to-face about the things concerning the Kingdom of God.  They asked questions and He answered them.  His final words to them were "And when the Holy Spirit comes on you, you will be able to be My witnesses in Jerusalem, all over Judea and Samaria, even to the ends of the world."  (Acts 1:8 The MSG)  Jesus picked the apostles to tell His story.  

In our follow-up Bible study, we were asked if we enjoy studying history.  I'm in the middle of watching a John Adams mini-series and I listen to Hamilton regularly, so I said yes.  😆 So, Sunday as I was listening to Hamilton, this song "Who lives, Who Dies, Who Tells Our Story"  really made me think about the sermon. Eliza Hamilton read all of her husband's (Alexander Hamilton, for those of you who are not as obsessed as I am!!)  writings and letters.  She interviewed the soldiers he fought with.  She talked to others who were close to him.  Then she took his dreams, which he died too soon to fulfill, and she did something with them.  She told his story.  

(I love the part of the song when Eliza says "I interview every soldier who fought by your side", then the soldiers say "She tells our story".  And when she talks about the Washington Monument, Washington sings "She tells my story".) 

It was so important that the apostles tell Jesus' story.  If they hadn't, we might never have known.  They were eyewitnesses to all He had done.  And it was important for all of the thousands between the apostles and us to carry His story to their generation.  And then to the next.  And so on....

I'm excited over the next weeks and months for Jeff and Tim to tell the apostles' stories, and in the process tell Jesus' story.  

What a great gift to be entrusted with someone's story.  I don't want to  just read His story, and keep it to myself.  I want to be faithful to tell it, and to teach other's to tell it.  I want God to be able to sing over me "She tells My story!!"

How will they remember me?

It's a weird thing to sift through someone's "stuff". You expect to have to do that when a loved one dies; but when she's still alive, it just feels like the ultimate "creeping".   But you can definitely tell what's important to a person by the things he/she keeps over the years.  Or by the things her loved ones pick up to take home.  It might be the family Bible. It might be some special jewelry or collectible. It might be Christmas ornaments or even the pot she always used to make holiday dinners. And, while all of this is important in family memories, "stuff" is not the legacy I want to leave. 

When I die, or just need my family to take care of my things, I hope they enjoy looking through all of the things that were important to me in this life. I want them to be surprised by some of the things I kept and to reminisce  over souvenirs from family vacations.  I hope they don't mind that I kept every paper they brought home in Kindergarten, but as space got filled, I only kept a few important things. I'm sure they'll get frustrated at some of the "junk" that will now be "their problem" (and yes, I forgive them in advance for renting a dumpster :) ) But that's ok, it was MY stuff, not theirs.  They will accumulate their own stuff that means something to them.  I don't want them to feel like they have to hang on to every little muumuu I ever wore  to bring honor to me. (I don't wear muumuus yet, but I plan to live to be old enough to have the chance!)  Look at it, relive it all and then let it go. (Unless you want to keep it, then feel free-it's yours. hee hee.)

 I was reading 1 Kings 5:3-4 today. "You know that my father, David, was not able to build a Temple to honor the name of the Lord his God because of the many wars waged against him by surrounding nations. He could not build until the Lord gave him victory over all his enemies. But now the Lord my God has given me peace on every side; I have no enemies, and all is well." (A letter from King Solomon to King Hiram- a close friend of Solomon's father,  King David.)  David has passed the job of building the Temple onto Solomon, his son. But more importantly, Solomon has embraced David's God as his own.  THAT is the legacy I want my family to find in my "stuff". As they sort and separate through my life, they find  that the thread woven through it all is "God was her God." And that's not enough. I want them to say "God is my God." That is what a legacy is after all, right? Anything HANDED DOWN from the past.  It's not sifted through and discarded, but taken home and treasured. I don't want my family to take my gingerbread man collection home and put it in the center of their table and say "This is who Mom was". I want them to take my love for God and make it their own. And then go out and build something that lasts forever!!

Love in the Mirror

 

Mike and I are celebrating our 25th anniversary on August 27th.  We are pretty proud of ourselves for making it to this milestone; we wanted to do something special and different to mark it.  Mike can't wear his wedding ring at work, so for years he's wanted my name tattooed on his finger. (I know...awwwww.)  We decided to go together and both  of us get a tattoo to celebrate.

I am a planner and worrier, so I started immediately searching google, pinterest, tumblr...anything I could find that featured ring tattoo designs.  There's a pretty elaborate selection- some are really cute, some are REALLY corny. (i.e. The wife had "I Do". The husband had "Ditto".)  Mike still wanted my name and I preferred they match/coordinate. But should I get "Mike" or "Michael"?  (I only call him Michael when he's in trouble.  hee hee) It was a lot to consider!!  So I picked  A♥M  Once we got to "A Different Drummer" the decision was made for us- they couldn't fit more than 3 characters on our fingers! So  Mike got M♥A.

 When the tattoo artist was placing the "trial" tattoo on, he had it facing out.  I asked "Is that the way they're typically placed?" He said "It's up to you." I said "I'd rather it face me; that way when we get older and I say "Now who is it that I love? Oh yeah. M." hee hee  So as you can see from the picture, it's facing me. A♥M  

But I realized something today as I was getting ready to meet Mike for lunch. When I look in the mirror, my tattoo changes to M♥A.  It took me a while to figure out what was happening ☺  Wow! Very cool. A constant, permanent reminder that I love him and he loves me.  I can't think of a time I need the reminder more than when I'm looking in the mirror.  When I'm putting on my makeup and can't seem to cover that pimple or wrinkle-M♥A.  When I'm fixing my hair and it's a BAD hair day-M♥A.  When I'm trying to decide if this dress makes me look fat or I just AM fat-M♥A. When I'm getting older and it's showing-M♥A.  He tells me ALL the time, but this is a NEW reminder.  The one I love, loves me. And he has for a long, LONG time. Happy Anniversary M! A loves you!

Smiley Faces To God

I might have an addiction to smiley faces.    And sad faces.   And all the others.  They are just so cute and can really set the tone for a conversation that is not face to face.

I just finished a Bible study that is all written out.  No teacher, just me and God.  First, I write out the scripture(s) of the day. Then I write my observations and applications. Next, prayer. (It's called the S.O.A.P method.)  As I looked back over my notes from the past 8 weeks, I realized how many times I used "smiley" faces to God.  For example, on 6/10/13, the scripture was Psalm 118:16 "The Lord is for me, so I will have no fear. What can mere people do to me?"  My "prayer" section said "Thank You for being FOR me!! " On 6/21/13, the verse was Luke 14:33 "So you cannot become My disciple without giving up everything you own." I replied with "I know I don't always live like it, but following You is worth it. Trusting instead of fearing is Hard. " You get the idea. But, am I being disrespectful in using something so "cutesy" when studying God's Word?

The Bible actually talks a lot about the look on someone's face.


Genesis 4:4-5 "Abel also brought an offering—fat portions from some of the firstborn of his flock. The Lord looked with favor on Abel and his offering, but on Cain and his offering he did not look with favor. So Cain was very angry, and his face was downcast".  


1 Samuel 1:18 "She said, 'May your servant find favor in your eyes.' Then she went her way and ate something, and her face was no longer downcast."    


Nehemiah 2:2 "And the king said to me, 'Why is your face sad, seeing you are not sick? This is nothing but sadness of the heart.' Then I was very much afraid."   


Proverbs 15:13 "A glad heart makes a cheerful face...."   


Proverbs 25:23 "Like a north wind that brings unexpected rain is a sly tongue—which provokes a horrified look." 


Matthew 6:16 " When you fast, do not look somber as the hypocrites do, for they disfigure their faces to show others they are fasting. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full."


Studying God's Word, writing it out, observing what it's saying, applying it to my life and praying back to God. It's all part of a  conversation, one that's not happening face to face.  Smiley faces help me to convey to God how I feel. And I believe God sends me smiley faces right back!! 


Numbers 6:24-26  “The Lord bless you and keep you, the Lord make his face shine on you and be gracious to you; the Lord turn his face toward you and give you peace.”’
 

This Old House....

On February 9, 2013, we celebrated 19 years in our home!!  It was a major renovation project!  I thought I would share some before and after pictures.  (Although it has changed a few times in between too!)

Kitchen Corner

Same corner after

I tried to take pictures from the same angle. We didn't think to take pictures of everything before, so there will be a few more after pictures.  ~kitchen~

We still have the same kitchen cabinets.

You'll see this same angle (before) down in the "family room" section

Mike added a bar which serves as our kitchen table

 ~Pantry~

Gross, we're going to put our FOOD here?

This would probably not pass any organizational test, but much better!

closed door on the pantry.  The door on the right goes to Jenna's room.

~Family Room~

This looking from the kitchen into the family room. to the right is the pantry.

 

This room was more of a back porch, we closed in where the banister is and made it a family room.

This is the "back porch" now our family room.  They had their laundry here, we moved it to the basement.

We added a sliding glass door a few years ago. 

This is the room where I do most of my babysitting.  Nice and sunny. 

This is where the banister was.

~Bathroom~

Old bathroom.

We had this same toilet until just a week ago.

Newest remodel.

~Bedrooms~

Kayla's room. Now it's Landon's room.  This room had the cutest window seat, but not much closet space.

Jenna's room.  Kayla and Jenna shared this room the last few years.

As close to a walk in closet as you can get in an older house.

Here's that cute window seat I was talking about.  That green curtain is the closet.

Jenna's room now.

The walk in closet :)

Jenna's room.

Landon's room now (I told you he will be on "Hoarders Jr." someday.

We added a closet and got rid of the window seat.

~Master Bedroom and Addition~

These windows are in the master bedroom.  There was an enclosed front porch.  Mike took the windows out, extender our bedroom out onto the front porch and added a bathroom.

The addition section of the master bedroom.  This used to be half of the enclosed front porch.

The whole bedroom.

Looking from the addition toward the rest of the house.

The bathroom that we added.  It's cozy!!

We didn't get any before pictures of the living room and dining room.  It was pretty hideous with dark paneling and green carpet.  They had started a drop ceiling.  If I could only add the smell to this blog!!  The house had sat empty for at least a year.  The people who lived here before just let their animals have the run of the place.  Mike had to cut a pretty big section out of the living room floor, including through the subfloor, because it was soaked with dog pee!!  We actually had people stop and want to see our house because they couldn't believe we'd made it livable!!
~Living Room and Dining Room~

So there you go!! We haven't had to hire anything done, Mike's done it all!!  I've always wanted to put these pictures together in one spot, so I did this mostly for myself!  But I wanted to share with all of my fellow "peeping toms"!!  I love to look in people's windows as we drive by!!  :)